Dear Santa...I can explain!

Today I was feeling much better after whatever it was that happened to me yesterday. My head was more clear, I could walk a straight line, and I was back home with my foster family. I was feeling so good, in fact, that I thought this would be a very good time to look for some new adventures around the house.

My first adventure was checking to see just how well Mommy had hung my stocking on the fireplace. (Someday I want someone to explain to me why she puts everything else in the dryer but hangs up just one of our socks in the living area.) It only took a few pulls to get my sock down so that I could chew on it a little...."little" meaning that Mommy was right there at the first bite, along with the NO word. She told me some wild story about not eating a hole in my stocking because my gifts from some guy, who supposedly was coming right down our chimney, would fall out. (Down the chimney? Maybe my mommy has been sipping too much eggnog???)

The next thing I decided to explore was this tree she has growing in the corner of her house. She had put some really cute balls on it....much cuter than the ones in my toy box. Some of them jingle, and some sparkle very, very much. Without much effort they can be plucked from the tree, and I was having so much fun rolling them around the floor. I even got a sparkling nose from playing with them. I soon came to realize, however, that she seems to think there is a serious distinction between the balls on her tree, and the balls in my toy box. I always let Mommy play with me and my toys, but she won't share the fancy balls on her tree with me! I tried to reason with her and show her how cute I was with glitter on my nose, but she used the NO word (yet again) and hung my new-found toys up high on her tree. I still think I might be able to reach them if I jump from the couch.

Next I turned my attention on Molly-pop, the cute grandbaby. Unlike Mommy, Molly shares... primarily her pacifier and Sippy-cup (I got my first taste of milk!). Molly-pop plays this fun game with me. She acts like she is giving me her pacifier, then plops it back in her mouth. That's my cue to grab it out of her mouth with my teeth and run. We love this game. Mommy doesn't. In fact, she said if I kept this up I probably wouldn't be needing my stocking.

Off I went to find another interesting plaything and I found something that is so much fun! Mommy has these little paper things in all of the bathrooms. I found out that if you grab the end of the paper and run, you can make it follow you all over the place! If it breaks, you just go back and get some more. It doesn't take long to get a whole lot of this paper down on the floor to play with. I just wish Mommy would remember to leave the bathroom doors open! Mommy put a whole new thingy of paper up and then walked right out and shut the door! I tried all three bathrooms and all of the doors are shut. Mommy keeps mumbling something about how I am going to get "coal" for Christmas. Coal? All I want is a few of those paper things!

These rules are growing old really fast. I can't go up the stairs without Mommy. I can't potty and poop in the house. I can't get on the couch. I can't eat shoes. I can't drink out of the toilet. I can't chew on electric cords. I can't hold my own leash. I can't pull the ribbons off the boxes under Mommy's tree...all of these fun things are on something called a "naughty list" that gets checked twice by someone that is watching me even when I am asleep! I think that is creepy!

If any of you need some coal, I think I am going to have enough to share.